Brown's Law

Once you find the key to open someone's heart lock, you can often use this key repeatedly to open some of his heart locks.
Proposed by: Steven Brown, an American professional training expert
Revelation: Finding a heart lock is a good beginning for communication.

Story: The nun without shoes
A pious nun came to India alone in order to save the suffering people. When she saw that the local people were in rags because of poverty and did not even wear shoes, she decided not to wear shoes because she could get closer to them and be more Good to help them. Even later when Princess Diana came to India to visit her after hearing about her great achievements, the Princess felt extremely ashamed because she wore a pair of white high heels...

Later, there was a war in the Middle East. The nun came to the battlefield alone. When both sides of the battle discovered that the nun had arrived, they unexpectedly stopped the attack and waited for her to rescue the women and children in the war zone. ...

When this respected nun passed away, the people of India all over the country mourned for her. No one would stand upstairs where her coffin passed, because she did not want to stand taller than her. The body's feet are still bare, declaring to the world that she is on an equal footing with the poor. This noble nun is Trisha.

story review
This nun's story also tells us: Finding a heart lock is a good beginning for communication. Know what others care about most, and the wishes of others will be in your grasp.

Skills of applying Brown's law
1. Observe carefully and look patiently
Finding the key to unlock someone’s heart is a discovery process that requires careful insight and patience. It requires "from the outside to the inside", and gradually analyzes some phenomena, and finally finds the lesion; it also needs to "see the big because of the small", through Some subtle words and behaviors of this person went to follow the vines, and finally found the "root" hidden behind him.
2. Master the "three basic characteristics" of people
Although all kinds of people have different heart locks and need different keys, looking at all kinds of dead knots, heart locks, bumps...There are still certain rules to follow.
First, people have a "selfish" instinct, so people's desire to communicate is often generated for some of their own interests.
Second, humans are emotional animals with emotional intelligence, and the essence of communication is first to communicate with emotions, not from ideas. Feelings are similar to everyone's understanding, but thoughts are divided into erudite and ignorant, and they are very different. Therefore, don’t place communication completely on knowledge, ideas, and preaching, but with a little more human touch, it will be much easier to communicate in a humane way, otherwise, it will be advanced academic discussion, not in the general sense. Communication.
Third, people generally have a new psychology and like new things. Correspondingly, the means and methods of communication should not be the same, as that often tires people.
3. Specific analysis of specific problems
When you can learn "specific problems, specific analysis" and master the "three basic characteristics" of the above-mentioned people, you will know that what others care most about interests, feelings, and freshness, rather than theory or principle. Then, the other party's wishes will be in your grasp, and your understanding and grasp of "Brown's Law" will begin to get started. When it is difficult to communicate with someone, you can easily find the key to open his heart lock, and you can use "this key" repeatedly to open some of his heart locks.

The case of Brown's Law
Zhu Yuanzhang, the founding emperor of the Ming Dynasty, was born in poverty. When he was young, he ran cows and worked for wealthy families. He even became a monk for a time. But Zhu Yuanzhang had great ambitions and eventually became the founding emperor of the Ming Dynasty.

After Zhu Yuanzhang became emperor, one of his childhood friends came to Beijing to see him. Zhu Yuanzhang wanted to meet his old friend, but he was afraid that he would say something unacceptable. Hesitating again and again, I can't let people say that I am rich and don't remember the old feelings, or let people pass in. The man knew that Zhu Yuanzhang had been a face-loving person since he was a child, so as soon as he entered the hall, he bowed down and shouted long live, saying: "Long live my lord! Back then, the ministers swept the Luzhou Mansion and broke the Guanzhou City. Marshal Tang was at large. , Hold General Bean, Red Boy as a soldier..."

Zhu Yuanwei heard him speak pleasantly and implicitly, and he was very happy. He recalled the situation when everyone was hungry and cold and had blessings and shared difficulties. He was very excited and immediately reappointed this old friend. Since then, because this person knows Zhu Yuanzhang's temper well, he can always speak to his heart, so Zhu Yuanzhang's appreciation is very much appreciated.

Later, the news came out that another partner who was grazing cattle also came to the capital. He was very happy to see Zhu Yuanzhang. For fear that the emperor would forget himself, he pointedly said on the golden temple, "Long live my lord! Do you remember? At that time, we all gave cattle to others. Once we were in a reed stilt, and we cooked the stolen beans in a crock pot. Before they were cooked, everyone rushed to eat and broke the pot. The beans sprinkled all over the ground, the soup was poured into the mud. You just grab the beans from the ground and eat them, but you got the mangrove roots in your throat. It was my idea to ask you to swallow a handful of vegetables. Swallow the mangrove roots into your stomach."

After Zhu Yuanzhang became the emperor, his biggest heart disease was that he was afraid of people mentioning his humble past. Seeing this childhood playmate said this in front of the civil and military officials, Long Yan was furious and ordered: "Where is the lunatic, come Man, drag him out and chop him out!"

People who don’t look at the person they are talking to, don’t know what the other person thinks, and just talk endlessly are the most stupid. Smart people will always understand the other person’s mind before communicating, know what other people care about most, so that they know what they should and shouldn’t say in order to get the best communication effect.